User talk:Livi en Rose

yeah so about that
you did absolutely nothing wrong livi. i was just tired of constantly wanting to message you. i was tempted every time i saw my discord. but i had nothing new to say so i never messaged. eventually i decided to cut myself off from my darp friends and you. im sorry i made you worry. i just couldn’t keep seeing your name and not message. and im not going to lie to you, seeing all your new names and statuses hurt too - but i don’t have a right to be hurt by that. so it was just easier to take you off my friends. it’s not like we talked anymore anyways. it just seemed like the best thing to do. so you did nothing wrong - you never did. it’s just me. im sorry im causing you trouble.

-Soc

oh yeah no
im good! truly, im not hurting anymore. unfriending y’all was more of a closure thing. it was an end (well i thought it was) of a chapter in my life. we did end on good terms. i have no hard feelings towards you at all. like i said, you never did anything wrong. i only hurt when i let myself get jealous. but whenever i realized i was being ridiculous, i decided to let go because i thought that was a mature decision. i didn’t know you’d even notice, let alone care enough to reach out. honestly it was a miracle i even saw your message. i sometimes go back to my home page on darp to see my characters for inspiration or to remember names or things like that. im sorry if i gave you the wrong impression. but im good - im happy. i really hope you’re happy too because you deserve to be. and same to you and your family - please stay safe. things keep getting kinda crazy.

-Soc

so i goofed
first off - hey. hows it going? lovely weather we're having. just the right amount of breeze and sunshine (it was actualy kinda rainy and cold today but that doesn't go along with this scenario im playing out). anyway, i hope youre doing well and not dying from corona because that'd be extrememly unfortunate. viral deaseases aside, i wanted to reach out to you and apologize. i realized today that i never really, truly apologized for what happened between us. ironically it happened when shawn mendes popped on the radio with if i cant have you. it made me think of you because thats the song you chose to think of me. and then i just kinda had an epiphany. i never apologized. thats like super crappy of me and i felt terrible because you dont deserve that. last year when i was so hurt by aera, all i wanted was for her to apologize to me. i felt like she didnt care that i was hurt or that she owed it to me or whatever. i just wanted her to say sorry and mean it. and with how bad that made me feel, i realized you deserved an apology too. so here goes that i guess. livi, you are such a wonderful little human bean. you care about all the things your friends are going through and are there beside them to carry their crap with them. i never thanked you for being so good to me and caring for me. you have no idea how much i appreciated you listening to me ramble about a show i was watching, or comforting me when i had a bad day, or just knowing my favorite color. you were such a good friend to me and i never thanked you. despite how amazing you were, i left you in a really trashy way. it was selfish and far too abrupt. i made you feel as though you'd done something wrong when i was the one who freaked out. i should've told you more about myself and about my family and my religion. i should've talked it through with you and let you help me instead of running away from it. it wasnt fair to you and i truly am sorry for not doing things the right way. you deserved better and i regret not being that for you. i dont need a response to this, nor should you feel the need to write one. i just wanted to give you what i never got before and what you deserved before we ever ended things. i really do hope you're doing okay. im sorry for goofing up.

soc

sakncvkernvke idk what to put here
i probably shouldnt even be writing this or reaching out or bothering you, but i am. i dont know if youll see it or if you want to see it. its okay if you dont, and im sorry if you dont. but you had told me to message you when i missed you. truth is, id already have blown up this talk page by now if i did that every time i missed you. today was particularly hard for me. i missed you even more today than on most days. i missed talking to you. i missed telling you very vague things like "going off to a random location this app tells me to hopefully see something cool and not meet a murderer" and you responding with something like "what in the world... please be safe" because even if i wanted to go on crazy adventures, you'd support me as long as i took care of myself. and then id get home and tell you what i really did and youd have that ohhhh moment and call me a dork or something for wording it the way i did, but i did it just to make you laugh or smile or do one of those really hard blows out of your nose like when theres a funny meme but you dont actually have the energy to really laugh. i just miss you. i miss talking to you. i miss waking up to read your livi facts. i miss staying up while you do the livi facts and reading them as they come in because you think im asleep but really im just reading every word in my bed and smiling to myself because holy crap livi is so cute and i love her. i miss her. im shaking as i write this because i know i shouldnt. i know itll only bring up old stuff or be beating a dead horse. but just this once, i just couldnt not tell you that i miss you. i miss you and talking to you and rping with you. i miss our ships and planning stuff together. i miss all that. and im sorry im not doing a great job at moving on, but i had to tell you. just today at least. i really do miss you and im sorry. i hope youre doing well and i hope i didnt bother you with all this. thats all i guess. im gonna go watch avatar or something to distract me, otherwise ill keep staring at this message and dwelling on it all night. okay im going now i promise.

-Soc